Jun 2, 2012
After coming back from our third Trans Health Conference
in Philly, I found Alexey sick in bed with a cold and I tried to cheer him up
by telling him about where we’ve been and how we’re considering taking them
sometime in the next couple of years.
Simone: We missed you guys so much at the conference. We
think we’re going to take you soon with us.
Alexey: To camp?
Simone: No, there is a camp for kids there, indoor…but
it’s a conference with lots of workshops where people teach each other. You
know how in our family, upstairs, we don’t care too much for gender or play
with gender and you can do whatever you want?
Alexey: Uh-huh
Simone: Well, we are not the only ones who think this way
about gender. This conference is another place where you can be however you
like and be accepted. There are lots of kids there that feel different things
about gender and a lot of adults as well. There you can wear a dress and feel
safe for 3 days and protected from the outside world.
Alexey: And you know, in school, when I said I want to
wear a dress at home, they said that’s for girls and then, they told me not to
do it.
Simone: Well, you know what I told you to say when they
do that, right? Just say ‘So what, it’s none of your business!’ and move on,
okay? You know we talked about how many people get all freaked out about that
kind of thing but you can of course do whatever you want but you should also
remember to keep yourself safe and comfortable.
Jun 3 2012
Alexey and I read “Dogs Don’t Do Ballet,” a book about a
dog that wants to be a ballet dancer but everyone tells him he can’t.
Eventually, he does and everyone cheers.
Simone: So, you see dogs do do ballet. Who else people
say can’t do ballet?
Alexey: Boys
Simone: And now what can we learn from this book about
that?
Alexey: That boys can do ballet too!
Simone: Good job, you’re amazing.
Process: Alex and I were very impressed that he saw the parallel
immediately.
Then he was watching a cartoon about Chuck and his car
friends. The bigger Truck said ‘little guy’ to some little car.
Alexey: Why ‘little guy’?
Simone: I don’t know. I don’t know why it’s gendered.
It’s just a car. Because it could be ‘little girl’ or…
Alexey: Little car
Simone: Exactly, you could just say little car.
Alexey: And he called the big car ‘Excuse me, Sir.’
Simone: Yes, it can also be Ma’am or you can just say
‘Excuse Me.’
A little later…
Alexey: Do you like this show?
Simone: No, not really. It all looks kind of the same and
the cars seem to be all boys.
Alexey: no, this one is a girl…I heard her sound like a
girl
Simone: Which is what? You mean higher pitched?
Alexey: hear this one
Simone: Oh it just sounds like a kid, though..the big car
said ‘c’mon boys’ which makes me think it’s all for boys only and that’s not
the kind of world we want to be in – it’s not very welcoming and it’s not
sharing and that’s why I don’t like it.
Alexey: Oh.
A little later
Simone: Oh, I see there is a mom there on the show.
Chuck’s mom.
Alexey: So see, there are girls.
Simone: Yeah, but what about
all the friends. They’re just boys. Sure, there is a mom but none of the bigger
cars or trucks are girls.
Alexey put on a necklace of mine
Alexey: And baba’s gonna say I’m a girl
Simone: Well….does it matter?
Alexey: No, I’m gonna play in the yard.
Alexey: Cut my hair only when it's as long as yours
Simone: Okay, but are you ready for all the stupid comments about how only girls have long hair.
Alexey: Yes!
Simone: Oh yeah, what are you gonna say?
Alexey: That boys can have long hair
Simone: And?
Alexey: And that it's none of their business!